When I last wrote, I wasn’t really quite sure what I missed about Korea. There were far more pressing matters at hand so I couldn’t spare any thoughts. But after six months of being back home, the update is this: I cannot stop talking about Korea. Everyone I know–long term, new faces, and even strangers–have heard many stories and facts I learned while living there, yet I still haven’t shared enough.
Sometimes the ears are unwilling to hear, and though it can be really discouraging sometimes, I decided not to worry about what other people think. I decided, even if somebody is annoyed, it still brings me great joy to share my story and memories because they’re precious to me.
Then, in the rare moment there is someone who is not only willing to listen, but curious to hear more, I light up. My whole heart is filled with fondness and eagerness. Don’t we all want to have someone listen to our stories like that? Don’t we all want to feel heard and known about the adventures of our lives, big and small?
It’s taken some time, but I’ve started enjoying all things Korea once again–which I avoided like the plague when I actually lived in Korea (and a few months after being home). Weird, right? Apparently it’s a language complex thing. You crave English so much, you don’t want anything to do with the foreign language that surrounds you. Culture shock, homesickness and all that.
But I can certainly tell you that I’ve come around a lot in these last six months. Just as my church family told me, joy and laughter has been (and continues to be) my healing, and now that I feel so much more myself again, I can see a whole slew of things I really so painfully miss about Korea. Ready for another list?!
The βThings I Miss About Koreaβ List:
- My friends, my students, the church I went to, my bus drivers–especially Guy in a Puffer Vest *cries*
- The change of seasons (Fall leaves, cherry blossoms and magnolia trees in Spring, rolling green hills in Summer…)
- Cheap cost of living and traveling in Korea because I have to sell my kidneys to travel anywhere in the US
- Unique and extremely aesthetic coffee shops on every block (I miss coffee wine, einspanners and peanut butter coffee!!)
- Croffles (Croissant + waffle iron = croffle)
- Earl grey tea cakes
- Unique international food and drinks like Vin Chaud (French mulled wine), Einspanners (Viennese coffee), brown goat cheese (Nordic cheese that tastes like salted caramel…yep it was amazing)
- How the little kids hold their arms up when they cross a street/parking lot so vehicles can see them
- Whipped cream on desserts instead of yucky fondant or buttercream–just fantastic desserts in general
- Cranes standing in the rice paddies, oriental magpies being silly
- The coffee shop owner who gave me free lattes and toasted sandwiches *cries again*
- Korean school lunches–dang they were delicious and nutritious
- How the bus drivers waved when they passed each other on the routes
- The elderly man and woman (Grandma & Grandpa, I called them) who walked with me to my apartment every week
- Healthcare that was so fast and cheap it was like a McDonald’s drive-thru
- Chicken stew (λλ리ν), ice noodles (λλ©΄), tteokboki & rabokki (λ‘λ³Άμ΄ & λΌλ³Άμ΄)
- Korean palaces and history
- Seeing North Korea every week–the diamond mountains and the flag
This list makes my heart hurt. But it warms me up to read it and to remember that even though living there was extremely hard, there were still so many good things and so many treasures I found. Now I know for sure that my love for Korea is not superficial. It’s not about the beauty, glam, and hype–it runs so much deeper than that. The people, the history, the culture, and the native Koreans who taught all these things to me re-shaped my love for their nation into something genuine and profound. I am deeply indebted to them.
What’s New?
It still shocks me to say this, but somehow I’m a Senior Advisor of International Affairs at Texas Tech University!
In the beginning of November 2023, about a week before my mom’s big surgery, I applied for the job. I had no idea what “Senior Advisor” even meant, I just knew I really wanted it. Every other job listing looked so utterly unsubstantial. After teaching English to Korean children inside the Demilitarized Zone, it turns out, most jobs kinda sound…uh, boring and wholly un-meaningful. Honestly. And so I realized I needed a job that really meant something to me, that was challenging and important on an international level. Otherwise I’d probably lose my mind.
If it wasn’t for that unwavering love for Korea which made me want to live there, which made me want to get my degree, which made me teach English in the DMZ…I would’ve never been qualified for such an important role.
So when my cousin told me about a position opening up for the International Affairs Department, I threw all my eggs into that basket. I didn’t apply for any other job and waited 3 months until I heard back from them. I worked on my resume and cover letter like I was writing a thesis; I researched Texas Tech even though I had no clue what a “Senior Advisor” even did. It felt like every person I talked to knew someone in that department and only ever had good things to say about them.
So my focus was like a lion on a hunt, with a scary kind of determination. Finally, after 3 months of waiting (by this time, it was January 2024), I got an email for an interview, which lead to another interview, and then a job offer. And now, by the goodness of God, I have a job that is the most meaningful job I could possibly have in a city I want to live in, where everything that I have ever possibly gone through in the last ten years can now somehow be applied to help a community of international students.
Now I’ve worked here for over a month and actually know what “Senior Advisor” means now (helping foreign students on an F-1 visa maintain their visa status), and have trained until my brains turned to mashed potatoes, but the work is equally rewarding as it is challenging and at the end of the day I feel pretty dang satisfied.
Also during this month, I’ve had plenty of time to stare at my office’s vacant beige walls and envision exactly how I want to decorate my space–how I want others to experience it, too. My brother helped me hang up some artwork (by Korean photographers so it’s even more special) and now I can officially say I’ve moved in, and I’m not planning on going anywhere anytime soon!
So…let’s you and I see just what kind of adventures are in store for a Senior Advisor of International Affairs!
Signed,
Allison the Adventurer
[ March 9th, 2024 ] An Update on Mom
The last time I gave an update on my mom, it was about two weeks before her surgery in November. I wanted to wait a good while throughout her recovery process before writing anything, so almost 4 months later, I can finally give a proper update!
Previously, you may remember that just before her surgery we were informed of a new unidentified mass in Mom’s esophagus. We learned that it was only some potentially infected scar tissue from a recent biopsy. It was nothing to worry about with a few antibiotics. It was one less (major) thing we had to worry about. Phew!
On November 20th, 2023, Mom went into surgery to remove the tumor on her thymus gland. It lasted approximately 2 hours. The surgeon, Dr. Jett, used robotic arms to remove the entire tumor along with the gland and was confident he removed 100% of the cancer!
But…while in surgery, he found that the tumor had pushed into one of the phrenic nerves–which is a very important one that helps the diaphragm move (which ultimately helps a person to breathe. See photo for reference.)
The nerve was already dead, according to Dr. Jett, which meant her diaphragm had been partially paralyzed prior to the surgery for who knows how long!
Might I re-iterate that the phrenic nerve is an important one. And helps a person to breathe. And that one of them was paralyzed. Well, though we had expected mom to recover in the hospital for only 2-3 days, we ended up staying for about 6 days because having only one of two phrenic nerves causes issues. Big issues.
The first day out of surgery, my brother and I noticed that Mom’s breathing was crazy weird. Imagine inhaling once, then exhaling twice. The surgeon took x-rays which revealed that her diaphragm had floated up against her lungs. Take a look at the white cloudy bits that are her diaphragm in the photos I snatched:
A second surgery was imminent, which meant we had an unanticipated extended stay at the hospital over Thanksgiving Day. Thankfully my Mom did just fine breathing on a big ol’ machine while we spent the next couple days waiting and watching holiday baking shows (she says she doesn’t remember which ones we watched lol.) Also, hospital turkey is dry but the pumpkin pie is fantastic.
The day of the second surgery, the surgeon performed a “Diaphragmatic Plication,” meaning that he sewed the diaphragm smaller and stitched it in place so that her lungs wouldn’t balloon outwards anymore. Pretty crazy he could do all this with robotic arms, by the way.
We were finally able to go home a few days later with oxygen tanks and a spirometer to strengthen Mom’s lungs again. All of this was new to us which was extremely stressful for everyone. We were terrified that we weren’t using the tanks correctly and maybe she wasn’t getting enough oxygen (which is practically slow suffocation. Terrifying, I say). I became stay-at-home Nurse Allison and recorded her improvement almost every hour and re-bandaged her 14 wounds a few times a day. Yep. I counted them all while my knees were wobbly.
At first, my mom could barely even walk. Her body was extremely sore (just imagine getting stabbed in the ribs 14 times), she had extreme loss of breath by barely moving, and the reality of her cancer journey coming to an end hit her like a freight train. She didn’t have to be strong anymore, and she cried constantly for at least two weeks. It was all part of the healing process–physically and emotionally.
Now it’s been about 4 months since her surgery, and (when she’s resting without the oxygen machine), her oxygen levels are better than they were before she even had the surgery! She still needs to use the machine as continued exercise for her lungs, but she goes for walks every day and is doing leaps and bounds better than she was in November.
Recovering from cancer is a big deal, not just to the one who had it, but to the whole family that it effected. I think we’re each in a different place about it, but for me, I have healed immensely thanks to my church family and my friends. There’s some ways to go, but I feel so much more like myself again as I watch my mom regain her strength. Community is important, guys. Don’t give up looking for it. Get tenacious and go after it. It’s what God made us for!
Speaking of the goodness of God, when He said He’d take care of my family when I left for Korea, He meant it. This testimony is proof.
π my very creative daughter-Iβm proud of you π
So good Allison. Everything you say always hits home. β€οΈ